The Pedicure Boot

"Anonymous sources tell us this exquisite piece will cause captivating controversy."

Costume National sandal boots, on sale for $378 (from $805) here.

"Star Trek" "Fashion"

Headbands are fun and they can enhance many a hair style. Modcloth says "You'll exhibit both good taste and high fashion when you wear this chic black headband with your evening gown and stilettos." Trust us - they cannot be trusted on this issue.

Because if you decide to purchase this headband ($79.99)...





...you may call to mind someone a bit outside the traditional fashion domain.


And, you know, that's your right, man. We just want you to know what you're getting yourself into.

She's a Super Freak, Super Freak

This saucy little outfit was actually Rick James' first choice for this album cover...

...but he decided it wasn't shiny enough. You see, this D&G sweatshirt is comfy-cozy cotton/spandex with genuine leather trim. It was originally $380, but you can get it here for a steal ($89)!

And in case you get caught in the rain while leaning against a lamp post, it has a hood:

(The pants wouldn't fit into over-the-knee boots, so don't even bother.)

Ugly Shoe Monday

This week's ugly shoes are all courtesy of Modcloth. Apologies in advance.

Tapestry clog-style wedges, Jeffrey Campbell, $118 here. These combine the iconic Beau Brummel paisley of the 1970s with a silhouette that evokes platform nurse's shoes.


Open-toed bootie, Irregular Choice, $154, here. I can't do better than their own description: "We have to wonder which came first - the bootie, the platform, or the heel?" The rest of us are wondering why they decided to stock it at all.

Striped sweater boots, $50, here (no designer will claim them). And now it's time for...shoe math!